When I come home after a fun, exciting day, I want to tell someone… but who to tell? I am so funny because I want someone to reciprocate and laugh with me and laugh at me and raise eyebrows with me. Usually, however, I get the impression that the people I talk with don’t receive me so positively? And then I think, “whoops, maybe I said the wrong thing?” that’s when I stop talking altogether, then I get funny looks. I am very intimidated. I think its laughable. Why do I give a shit? Um… maybe because I don’t want to appear an asshole, or insensitive, and I don’t want to laugh at all of my own jokes.

Sometimes I want to talk so bad that I must second-guess myself in such a way: “Why am I trying so hard to be an engaging conversationalist?” (I want that person to like me but not that much). I did some very mild internet research and learned that such a trait is often associated with psychopaths…? Trust me, I would rather feel reluctant to speak than fit into such a demographic.

And then comes the real dilemma: Why am I talking into the internet? Why am I talking to my blog and not a real ear?